Farm Journal Update
June 16: Periodically I write things in this farm journal I'm keeping for my readers this year that cause my pants to spontaneously combust. Weirdest thing.
June 17: I graze on fruit and vegetables all day as I work. Due to sheer garden abundance, I'm shamefully wasteful about it. Lettuces are picked, the blanched, succulent centres knawed out, the remainder tossed aside to feed the soil, My version of lighting his cigar with a hundred dollar bill. But, due to time constraints, I'm pretty rough 'n' hasty about it, so I often end up with unintended snacks in my belly. I've ingested a lot of soil this way. And today I ate half a ladybug, which has to be, I don't know, like 5 years bad gardening luck. I hadn't noticed it on the kale leaf I was munching on until its top half was in my belly. Incidentally, the ladybug's presence on the kale leaf was likely a strong indicator that the aphids have arrived for the season. A single ladybug can consume 400 aphids a week. The aphids don't actually ruin my kale crop, but decrease its profitability due to the extra time required to wash them off. Incidentally, did you know that certain species of ants manage aphids in a similar vein to our management of dairy herds? Google 'aphid-ranching ants'. It's fascinating.
June 22: Colleague Jennay Oliver, owner-farmer of Paynter's Fruit Market, gave me a Paynter's Market t-shirt to wear out and about. I asked for a medium. This was a tad ambitious. I put it on and it looks like someone threw grey saran wrap over a jello mold. I don't think this will create the positive assocations with her business she intended, so for her sake it's now a pajama top.
June 30: A cringeworthy email from a new chef customer. I cooperate with a local thespian/fishmonger to save him some delivery time by carrying his seafood on my delivery route. This is how I met the chef in question. I found out from the monger that one of his staff inquired if I was married. So, when the chef yelled out "It's Mr. Muscles!" when I arrived for my next delivery, naturally I thought he had been teasing his employee about her apparent attraction. In a subsequent email-offer of veggies to the chef, I added: "And FYI, my girlfriend laughed at the Mr. Muscles designation. She calls me T-Rex because she says I have small arms and shoulders."
His reply came a few hours later. "Funny. I'll take 1 Kale, 1 Arugula, 1 Salad. Sorry for the delay. Awkward story though. You know I was referring to the "Mussels" you were delivering right! See you Sat. The ladies in the kitchen will be excited. And I look forward to seeing you too T-Rex."
Same: Vanessa is home from her hospital placement in Uganda, safe, sound, and glad to be back after a pretty intense experience. Some of you had been asking about that...now you know!